Saturday, October 1, 2016

A Few Thoughts on Status Quo and Spiritual Journeys from Kendra. :)

Before I begin, I realize this is a chance for me to tell my story.  

It might not be your story.

Our collective story is what makes us better.

My story swirls around me, especially in these past two years.  

I often wonder how that story can encourage and inspire others to journey.  

So I'm going to give it a full shot.

The story began to come out with a tweet:  

Screenshot 2016-09-28 at 7.15.45 PM.png

Look at the tweet from Mary Ann Reilly:  “Status quo is often a resting place.  Before I interfered, I’d want to honor resting.”  (Also, follow her if you don’t.  She is quietly brilliant and unassuming. Sometimes I think social media is a weird place to be.  But I always feel Something when I read and look at her work.)  It was this tweet that stopped me in my tracks and caused me to pause and reflect on everything I’ve been considering over the past 2-3 years.  

Where in education are we?  Are we constantly looking to stay a step ahead and be considered innovative, that we’ve lost sight of rest and reflection?  

In a culture of compliance and the trend to be innovative, I fear we are losing our best educators.   
Test more.  Organize your data.  Be brilliant with the spreadsheet.  Innovate and create amazing lessons that make kids want to come to school.  Really, who can be all these things all the time?  And do them well.  

The culture reminds me of a roller coaster we went on this summer as a family.  You would be riding along peacefully, and then you would be jerked to the left or right.  You’d get to the top of the hill and then fly to the bottom, only to start the climb again.  My youngest and I, not being crazy about roller coasters, left that ride feeling a little tired, bewildered and ready for a good cold drink.  I think this analogy fits for how I felt at the end of my tenure as a public educator.  

At my worst, I would sit at our kitchen table and cry.  I wasn’t good enough, I wasn’t writing enough lessons, my newsletter wasn’t like the kindergarten teacher's (words said to me), I wasn’t teaching what I knew what was best practice.  And then I’d pick myself up (or my husband would push me up) and I’d get back at it.  But I only held that frantic pace for about 3 years.  

And by the end I was burnt out.  And wounded.  All I could do was look at the pacing guide and go through the requirements.  Status quo.  But even in those moments I was rebuilding my spirit as an educator.   I just didn’t know it yet.   

Colleague support?  Yes!  But they were (and still are) working at the same frantic pace.  With meetings, and requirements, and the push to continue to innovate.  And I worry about them.  How long can they continue to push at this pace?

What I can only describe as a spiritual journey, I crashed-landed at a Lutheran Day School.  I went searching for this position almost out of spite based on what I had experienced.  (Because I love these people, I want to tell you it is definitely ministry based, not private minded.)  

And it was here that I began to rebuild a spirit inside me that I didn’t even know was there anymore.  I use music daily.  I dance in the classroom.  Today we laughed because I prayed for my 7 year old Birthday Girl to be an old, old, Granny someday.  :)  Kids were eager to show me their writing, they are tackling books, and they love science.  I have time to consider books written by experts and what they mean for my students and my teaching.

When I consider the journey I’m on, yet, I reflect on Mark 6:31.  And he said to them, “Come away by yourselves to a desolate place and rest a while.”  Even Jesus, you know, Jesus, instructed his people to rest.  

So, back to status quo and rest.  I’ve learned to observe.  Step back.  Learn the story.  Everyone has one.  Everyone.  

I’m reminded that God wants his people to rest.  He’s equipped Teachers to be who they are.  He tells them to rest.  

I’m not left with many answers.  I know that Public educators are not really being invited to do that at this time.  How do we honor the resting that takes place in some status quo, or in good frameworks in teaching?  

I’m learning Lutheran educators are better, but still not great at rest.  The ministry has to be done people.  Giddy up.  Let’s go!  Where is the rest?  It is almost a badge of honor to not to.  How do we change this mindset as Christians, who have been commanded by, you know, Jesus, to rest?  I don’t know.  

Meanwhile, if you see a teacher who seems to be caught in status quo, I would now encourage you to be gentle with them first.  Step back and see them.  See their story.  Find the rest that they need, and honor it.  Be careful about pushing them too quickly.  

Let them rest awhile.    

Joy! (And Rest!)
Kendra



5 comments:

  1. Moving, beautiful post. Gentle, yes.

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  2. So much to think about! Thank you for articulating so much of what I'm experiencing as a super-discouraged public educator!

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  3. Kendra,
    Thanks for the reminder of the importance of reflection and rest.

    And this: "So, back to status quo and rest. I’ve learned to observe. Step back. Learn the story. Everyone has one. Everyone."

    Cathy

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  4. Thank you, Kendra, for sharing your story. It touched my heart. I need that rest reminder.

    Loved your granny prayer! I giggled! I can picture the moment in your classroom!

    Ruth Ayres shared this quote one time..."What God accomplishes in our bodies while we drift off to dreamland is nothing short of miraculous. While we do nothing, God replenishes our energy, rebuilds and restores our cells, and reorganizes information in our brains. I'm sometimes tempted to believe that the work I do while I'm awake is more important than the work God does while I sleep, but refusing God's gift of sleep is like telling Him that my work is more important than His." - Julie Ackerman

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  5. Side note: I love your Twitter photo!

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